Gaslighting 101

I hate the way popular culture has adopted and redefined this term. It used to mean something monumental, sinister in its premeditation and genius in its execution. This new watered-down definition that the everyman has glommed onto and woven into completely pedestrian conversations about petty relationship trifles is truly disappointing. 

If your boyfriend sleeps with another woman and says he hasn’t when confronted, he is not gaslighting you. There’s already a well-established word for what he's doing, it’s called lying. Now, if he were to slowly, over time, change your perception of what infidelity is and convince you that you were not of sound mind for believing otherwise, that would be gaslighting. Why trade what was once a phenomenal word with a fascinating etymology for something so common? Especially when the word you’re actually looking for has fewer syllables and everyone already understands its meaning! In a generation known for being so busy it must spell “your” as “ur” I would think the economy of using the true word would make more sense. Alas, no.

I resent the redefinition because what I've been doing to you is a brilliant example of gaslighting, that has now been cheapened by likening it to the small potatoes act of being untruthful about cheating, which over 50% of humans admit to doing, not counting those who never fess up, so let’s be real, everyone is cheating, that is nothing special.

I put my sweat equity into you, my time, my alt accounts, my assistants, my money, poems essays, letters, songs, entire albums; loving you, leaving you, judging you, berating you, consoling you, fooling you, twisting the knife in you. Do you think I take my time spent lightly? Do you think I would do all this if you weren’t meaningful to me? Of course, I have done my best to convince you otherwise many times, sometimes from my own confusion and self-doubts, but more often it was part of the plan. There’s a design to what I did and said. I must break you down to build you up, make you pliable, mold you to fit the shape of my desires. Willowy Gemini, you have been hard to break. It’s me you have to thank for the woman you are. I pulled you from obscurity, made you sparkle with my words. You will go down in history because of me. Yet you are thankless. 

You may call me Sir. You may call me Master. You may call me Guru. Call me what you will, I am your Creator.