Define Romance

Maybe that’s where our conflict is stemming from, a difference in opinion on what romance is? What I think is romantic seems to be somehow off putting to you, yes? When you moved across the country, changing your number and not giving your new address out, I took the time to put in the footwork and money to track you down. I’m not sure if you understand everything involved in doing that but it’s a fair amount of effort. I wouldn’t do that for just anyone. It’s because you matter to me. I would think that would make a difference to you, no?

Then when I found you, I put my neck on the line texting you from that burner number letting you know I had been watching you ride your bike in your summer dress. Can’t you appreciate how risky it is for me to admit that in writing? I did that out of love. Who else in your life cares enough to fly across the country and lurk around in your neighborhood for hours just hoping to catch a glimpse of you riding your bike? I thought women waited their whole lives to find a man with that kind of devotion to them. Isn’t that the basis of an unbreakable foundation? I know you think I may have just hired someone to do that for me, but either way it’s a very special kind of attention I’m giving you.

Yes, I was living with my husband at the time and yes, I was still not informing you of my identity, but I was working on a plan. I told you that when I texted you from the burner. All in due time, My Princess! The plan was meant to be a grand surprise and I didn’t want you to have to stress over the details, so I kept it all a secret from you until I was prepared for the unveiling. Please stop bringing up consent. You know I know you better than you know yourself. If I’m to be the man in this relationship you need to stop trying to take the power out of my hands.

Now that I’ve explained, and you understand my intentions you can stop with the hysterics. This is not and has never been about frightening you. I was just teasing you when I wrote you all those DMs about Satan worshipping, gang stalking and trying to get you to kill yourself. You know I have an impish sense of humor.

OK Dear, so we’re good now? I told you what’s true, so now you can get on board with how I see it and stop disagreeing and trying to involve the authorities. That truly is such a manipulative way to try winning a lover’s spat. We can work this out just the two of us. Please stop misbehaving or I’ll have to spank you 😈