Stalking by Proxy

“If all else fails, the abuser recruits friends, colleagues, family members, the authorities, institutions – in short, third parties – to do his bidding. He uses them to cajole, coerce, threaten, stalk, offer support, tempt, convince, harass, communicate and otherwise manipulate his target. He controls these unaware instruments exactly as he plans to control his ultimate prey. He employs the same mechanisms and devices. And he dumps his props unceremoniously when the job is done.

One form of control by proxy is to engineer situations in which abuse is inflicted upon another person. Such carefully crafted scenarios of embarrassment and humiliation provoke social sanctions (condemnation, opprobrium, or even physical punishment) against the victim. Society, or a social group become the instruments of the abuser.

Abusers often use other people to do their dirty work for them.” 

- Sam Vaknin